Christmas Cake

This is the cake I made last year - it was awesome. It takes a while to make it, but it's well worth it, and the level of actual effort required is practically nil. Here's the recipe:

600g raisins, sultanas or a mix of both (I like the Asda raisin and sultana mix)
250g currants
100ml alcohol plus 100ml more for feeding
250g plain flour
2 tsp mixed spice
200g butter
200g soft dark brown sugar
4 free range eggs
Grated zest of one orange and one lemon
75g nuts, finely chopped
100g glace cherries, quartered

1. Put the raisins, sultanas and currants into a big bowl and slosh on the booze. I always use more than 100ml! Last year I think I did rum, but this year, just to be posh, I'm using organic whisky. It smells lush, and I don't even like whisky! Cover the bowl with clingfilm and leave it to soak for 24 hours, stirring occasionally.

2. Line a tin (20cm-deep square tin - I got mine from Tesco - or 22cm-deep round tin) with three layers of baking paper. This is a real pain, but do it anyway. Preheat the oven to 150C/130C fan/Gas 2. Wrap the outside of the tin with a double layer of newspaper or brown paper and tie it in place with string.

3. Cream the butter and sugar together in a large bowl. Beat in the eggs, one at a time, adding 1 tbsp of flour with each one.

4. Quarter the cherries, using scissors, and drop them into the flour. This helps them to stop sticking to every damn thing they come into contact with. Put the flour and cherries into the mixing bowl, along with the orange and lemon zest, spice, nuts, boozy fruit and any soaking liquid that's left. Note: I don't put nuts in my cake, so leave them out if you like. I also may throw in (depending on my mood) extra cinnamon, nutmeg and/or ginger.

5. Put the mixture into the tin and level the top. Pat the top with wet fingers - sounds odd, but it stops the top of the cake drying out during the long cooking time.

6. Bake the cake for two hours, then reduce the temperature to 140C/120C fan/Gas 1 and bake for a further hour and 45 minutes, or until a skewer inserted in the middle comes out clean. If it starts to brown too much, cover the top with a double piece of baking paper. I usually do this after two hours. Remove the cake from the tin and cool it on a rack, but don't remove the baking paper. Wrap the cake in foil and store it in an airtight container.

7. After a week, unwrap the cake and pierce with a skewer all over the top. Apply booze liberally. Repeat weekly until Christmas.

Ta-Daaaaahhhhh!!

If you can be bothered, decorate the cake. Brush it all over with warmed sieved apricot jam, then add a layer of rolled-out marzipan. Brush the jam over the top of the marzipan, then put on a layer of rolled-out icing. You can then add ribbons/festive characters/whatever, and everyone will think you bought it. Winner.